My sweet friend N'Kara gave me a chopsticks and case set this weekend. It is oh-so-cute, but the best part, by far, are the instructions on the back. As an English geek, I must share:WARNING
- Wash it with warm water after use and wipe with soft cloth.
- Do not leave it in the water for long time.
- Do not wash it with a scrubbing brush, any washing powder. There are possibilities of getting wounds and run out of the color.
- Please keep it off from the fire because of making it melted and the color changed. Do not use it in any hot water and the fire directly.
- Please not use it with the dish washer, the tableware dryer and the microwave oven.
- Please change it to a new one as soon as possible if it get cracked or damaged.
- There are possibilities of smell of the resin, however it is a inspecting standard acceptable commodity of Japanese food sanitation law and food additive.
- Use it with care when Children use. It is a thin ahead.
- Do not use it as other things.
The last three kill me. And then N'Kara told me about the website engrish.com.
I think my English degree just exploded.
6 comments:
lawdy lawdy ... you just made my day.
We get a lot of Engrish and Chinglish in Australia. I like to make fun, but then, are our own "instructions" any less pathetic, even when they are spelled correctly??
How to Use Shampoo
Step 1
Either go through your hair with a wide-tooth comb to loosen dirt and dead skin or gently massage the scalp for a couple of minutes which will do the same job.
Combing also has the advantage of making sure your hair is not tangled before you wash it. Wet hair is fragile and trying to de-tangle wet hair can cause damage.
Step 2
Thoroughly wet the hair with WARM water, avoid high temperatures.
Step 3
After putting a dollop of shampoo on the palm of one hand and then dividing it into the palm of the other hand (simply rub hands together), gently distribute the shampoo over your hair as evenly as possible, preferably using a stroking action. (See Appendix regarding quantity)
Step 4
Rinse the hair with generous quantities of warm water.
Step 5
Rinse your hair again with generous quantities of warm water. (Generally one time is not enough. It takes a lot of water to thoroughly rinse away the shampoo. Remember, shampoo residue left in the hair can contribute to dull looking hair.)
Step 6
Use a towel and dab your hair, (don't rub), to remove excess water.
Step 7
Put a dollop of conditioner into the palm of your hand, divide it into the palm of the other hand and evenly distribute over the surface of the hair. Generally this light application will be enough to treat the hair. Usually it doesn't increase the effectiveness of the conditioner to leave it on for extended periods. Conditioner usually works immediately it comes in contact with the hair and hair cuticles.
Step 8
Rinse the conditioner away thoroughly with WARM water.
Step 9
Dab or pat your hair with a towel to remove excess moisture. Don't rub as wet hair is fragile and liable to be damaged with rough handling. Wrapping the towel around the head for a few minutes can be effective in getting rid of the moisture.
Appendix
How much shampoo should you use?
If you wash your hair every day one application of shampoo, a dollop roughly 1 inch in diameter, should be enough.
If you wash your hair after two or three days, you may need to repeat the application.
I rove engrish.
that was awesome... and the shampoo instructions? Gold.
Lauren, that is too funny. What brand are we talking about?
I'm not sure... it was posted on a shampoo instructions forum!!
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